When you have an illness that includes symptoms that make you believe you are a god, causes hyper sexuality, extreme irritability and crippling fatigue, people may not want to be around you. These symptoms of bipolar disorder can make it a challenge to keep friendships.

I have had three full blown manic episodes where I was psychotic and I have had several acute depressive episodes. Every time they happen, I lose most of my friendships. The most devastating symptoms I have when I have manic episodes are irritability and psychosis. Once the episodes are over, some people avoid you and act extremely uncomfortable around you. Both reactions are not conducive to positive relationships. During depressive episodes, it is hard to socialize because of the fatigue which has also led to a loss of friendships.

For me, the foundation of creating friendships despite the chaos that my illness causes is support from my friends who have bipolar disorder. They are compassionate, non-judgmental, creative and intelligent. I am comfortable being around them regardless of how well I am because they understand what I am going through. They have empowered me to create a consistent positive life despite the chronic nature of the illness.

In addition, I take my medication, see my psychiatrist regularly, and I have an activity level that is within my capacity. I am aware of changes in my body that may mean an acute episode may be coming and make adjustments to my routine accordingly. I have done everything in my power to decrease the chances of a full-blown episode from occurring and I have a routine that makes my chronic symptoms more manageable. This has led to consistent stability which has helped me with my relationships.

Now, I have several friends. In addition to my friends who have bipolar disorder, I value my friends who do not have the illness and have stuck with me despite some of the challenges I face. Plus, I have new friends who have no idea that I have an illness that has made me believe I am a god on one occasion. I am grateful for all of them. They make me laugh, bring me joy and ground me in a sense of connection. They support me through difficult times, and I have the honour of supporting them when they go through challenges.

Human beings need to feel that they belong to our massive herd. In my opinion,  for people who have bipolar disorder, this connection can be cultivated by building a positive routine that minimizes the probability of having an acute episode. If one can achieve this level of functioning, you can attract the people you need into your life and create greater resilience as well as long term happiness and fulfillment.